I Was So Wrong!

I got into an ugly and emotionally-charged argument about Hansie Cronje, at that time he was accused of match-fixing but he was still innocent till proven guilty and I argued he was innocent and it was all a smear campaign, a few days later he told a packed press conference, ‘’The devil made me do it’’.

I had gotten it so completely wrong. It was not the first time nor was it the last.

You don’t even want me to start counting how many times I’ve said, ‘’She’s the one’’ only for the proverbial golden cup to be broken later. And in all the times I’ve said, ‘This is it, this one becomes Mrs Nkosi’, I sincerely meant it. But stuff happens, either way I have been wrong.

I get it so ridiculously wrong at times it hurts, I have even planted my seed in the most diabolically-wrong womb I could have chosen. But that’s me, I’m the guy who gets it wrong once in a while.

I have produced some episodes (on TV) that were so wrong making me watch them again is tantamount to torture. Yeah, they sure don’t even make 1% of all I’ve produced but I had been trusted to make riveting TV, instead I messed it all up.

I’ve said things that I later deeply regretted but that’s me again, I’m prone to getting it wrong from time to time.

I have chosen some of the nastiest and deeply immoral characters as friends, and of course they have stuck knives on my back while I wasn’t looking, but I’d had CHOSEN them and invited them to my life. I was so wrong in my choices.

I have pledged my allegiance to people who didn’t think twice about spitting me out the moment they felt I’d overstayed my usefulness, I was loyal to people who didn’t deserve my unwavering loyalty, I was wrong about them. They were always bastards, I was wrong not to have seen it earlier.

I have walked away from some of the most amazing women, in as much as my heart has moved on, I can’t deny the fact that they were amazing women. I was wrong not to notice that.

I have stuck my ‘magic stick’ unwrapped in ‘cookies’ that could well have meant the beginning of the end of my life. I was stupid, I was wrong. Dangerously wrong.    

I have made many wrong choices and decisions, if one day I ever come across as intelligent and clever, it’ll be all thanks to a lifetime of stupidity and wrong decisions.

But I have a history of binge-drinking and messing with the white powder, at least I have an excuse. What’s yours? Stupidity, right? Right! J

Things Change...

Most people will tell you that rats have always been there, we’ve reluctanly shared our space with them forever, but let’s be honest – things have changed and right now at times you feel under siege. Rats have gone bigger and are more than ever before. Are we really under attack from the rat folk? OK, rats started making their heavy presence felt in the East Rand or Ekurhuleni in Jozi, Boeremag is from the East Rand, and let’s not forget that these boere folk had ideas of walking all the darkies to Zimbabwe like a shepherd would do with his sheep, so if these okes had such a ‘complicated’ strategy what are the chances they’re using rats as part of their strategy. Yes it sounds lame even if the brains behind it was Steve Hofmeyer but a theory worth considering anyhow. I mean, honestly, where do all these rats came from?

But not all change is threatening, some things have changed for the better. When I was much younger having a mini-supermarket or even a few taxis was enough to have one called a tycoon, these days darkies are rolling in Aston Martins and people under the age of 30 are rocking wrist watches worth R250 000. Things have changed! We’re now having croissants and blue cheese for breakfast. Things have changed, Charlie!  Back in the day, for birthday parties we decorated the table with Pine-Nut and Fanta Orange cold drinks, these days we decorate it with sushi and sushi models.

Back in my days you’d patiently court a girl for months while she was ‘processing your application’, these days it’s not uncommon to ask for phone numbers from a woman at a party and have her say, ‘Msizi, why my numbers? Can’t we get this thing over and done with tonight or tomorrow morning latest?’ Sadly that sort of sexual liberalism has its drawbacks, as you’d spotted the concern on the eyes of a friend who’s just been told his ex is sick, and you know it’s not the concern for her ex he’d normally worry about. Stuff has changed.

The same outfit you wore at a nightclub last weekend you can wear in church this Sunday. Sometimes I see more cleavage in church than I do on facebook profile pictures. Things have changed.

But it’s beautiful to see darkies running empires and huge corporations and doing so successfully. It’s great to see young people dreaming beyond the common. It’s that kind of change the likes of Solomon Mahlangu, Steve Biko and many more paid for with their lives. But politics have changed, politics no longer attracts revolutionaries but businessmen and careerists in it for the loot.

These days it’s not uncommon to see the President of the country attending soccer matches, horseracing, music awards and every other social event, even the opening of a mall! Things have changed Charlie!

And things will continue to change, perhaps soon we might see Muvhango (SABC2) characters start kissing, yeah the historic first Muvhango kiss might be on the horizon.

We might even see Kaizer Motaung and Dr Irvin Khoza start believing a darkie can actually coach their respective teams successfully, or else we need to stop blaming white people for not believing in us if even our own also don’t. They’d rather take a chance with an unknown and untested white palooka than an experienced darkie, but we hope someday they too will change.  In our lifetime please Bra Kaizer and Bra Irvin. Just a few months ago Kaizer Chiefs fired their physiotherapist, why? She was a woman and the coach didn’t like the idea of a woman working with men.

As things continue to change, some things refuse to change.

It’s the way kungakhona.  

'Could Not Sing Our Good Ol' Song...'

One of the depressingly mystifying phenomenon’s  has been to witness starlights fading way before their time.

Soccer ace Ronaldhino was rated way above the little magician called Lionel Messi, well that was a few years ago, today at the age of 30, an age whereby soccer stars are a the peak of their powers, Ronaldihno is heading home to Brazil after warming the bench for two years in Italy. He once could make the soccer ball dance, today he’s a miserable shadow of his former self.  What happened Ronnie?

We wished and pleaded with the gods of kwaito to bring us back TKZee, and they obliged, but what an anti-climax the most anticipated album turned out to be. What happened to the magic guys? Listening to TKZee now it’s very difficult to imagine these guys were the kwaito supergroup of the late 90’s.

If you’ve lived in the ghetto you’d know of at least unwillingly rehabilitated thug who once changed cars more than Kaya KM changes their breakfast show DJ’s, a ghetto hero who once made you believe he was invincible but later lost his magic, then we say waphelelwa i-plug (he ran out of the thug bravado).

A woman who once was veeeeery HOT before ‘boys had their way with her’, you’ve heard of something like that, haven’t you? Can a woman really lose her beauty because of her generous sexual nature? Phuza-face aside? Maybe she loses her X-factor and that air of mystery as word gets around she’s ‘easy’, but does her physical beauty actually fade? Many guys tell me it happens. What happens to the magic?

You mean in a few years time there’s a possible tragedy of John Legend not being able to go in the studio and come back with a hit? Imagine Professor, he of the ‘Jezabel’ fame coming out of a recording studio with a lullaby. Oh God please forbid!

You’ve seen a once super couple turn into arch enemies, you’ve seen bosom buddies turn into sworn enemies. Oh so tragic when the magic is gone, when the melody has changed, when they just couldn’t sing their good old song like they could in the good ol’ days.

But is it really divine intervention when the magic is lost or it’s just pure complacency? What are chances Trevor Noah will just be an ‘also-ran’ in a few years time?

More than ten years in the TV industry I’ve learnt this – there is a time in a rising star’s career when the most crucial thing to do is to keep their feet firmly on the ground. Sadly, not many cope with this phase, sometimes people become superstars in their own heads way before they can unleash their true potential, finding a humble superstar is as difficult as finding a Chinese policeman. I know of very few humble stars, Robert Marawa, Steven Pienaar, Prokid, Kirk Franklin…am I forgetting anyone?

You see, in SA we suffer from the ‘I’ve-arrived-syndrome’, one is on TV for fifteen minutes and the head swells. You play a few games for Kaizer Chiefs and assume the sun shines on your ass, you are put on radio for five minutes and all of a sudden you’re a celebrity, guys chill, please? Perhaps that’s why a country of 48 million people can only conjure up only three people as real international stars, other than Mandela, Ernie Else and Charlize Theron who do we have as international superstars recognizable worldwide?   A country with such enormous talent, what a shame.

So maybe the magic is never lost, it’s destroyed by the ego and the unwillingness to continue learning.

In 2011 may your star keep shining success after success, may you never believe the lying voices in your head telling you you’ve arrived. May you squeeze every inch of potential you have till it cries for mercy. May you never take your friends, family and lovers for granted.

Remember, your talent came from God, but what you do with it is a gift back to Him. You reckon He’s happy with what you’ve given Him?

Happy new year.